Laying on the table on the day of the embryo transfer a month ago, there was SO much anxiety about whether transferring two was the right thing to do. We had beautifully perfect embryos that both had a REALLY great chance of continuing into a successful pregnancy. That was reassuring enough to possibly be convinced to transfer only one of them. But then the reality that we transferred 2 embryos with Greysen and ended up with a singleton pregnancy threw a wrench in that decision. I wouldn't change a thing about the process with Greysen. However, I couldn't shake the idea that I might regret transferring only one if it didn't end in a pregnancy. My doctor agreed that we needed to make the decision we felt the most peace about. And even though transferring both of these little magic beans meant that we had a 56% chance (or higher) that they would result in a twin pregnancy, we felt peaceful about our decision...
And now seeing the two of them snuggled up next to each other in my womb...their two little hearts beating nearly in unison...I KNOW we made the right choice! I know these two angels were supposed to stay together. I know they were destined to be each other's "womb-mates". While we definitely don't have any idea how tough two newborns are going to be when they get here, we know beyond a shadow of a doubt that we are ready for this challenge in our lives!
You should know, also, that the timing of this pregnancy is uncanny. A little more than a year ago was the last time I got to see my sweet Mimol on this side of Heaven. On that same day that I had to leave, I also got to tell her that we were pregnant! She was beside herself excited about that! She asked me (still fearing the inevitable) "Rachel...am I ever going to get to hold this baby?" I told her (trying to ease some of her anxiety) "Of course Mimol!" I didn't know then how true that statement was. We lost my grandmother less than a week later, and then 2 weeks after that we lost our baby. On ultrasound, we saw no heartbeat and it was clear our sweet baby had passed about 2-3 weeks before that scan. She left us at almost the exact moment that Mimol left us...
But would you believe that Wednesday was the anniversary of my Mimol's passing? A day that could have been filled with overwhelming sadness was filled with the overwhelming JOY of these beautiful TWINS thriving and living and growing. Would you also believe that the official due date of these babies is April 9th? That's the exact due date of our sweet Soutine that we lost last year. God didn't just deliver, He LAVISHLY poured His love and redemption over all of us...He still is. He is just showing off at this point! Reminding us, through those two beautiful strong 7 week old heartbeats, that He is still in the business of miracles. Reminding us that He doesn't just "give"...He LAVISHLY GIVES. He can do immeasurably more than we can ask or imagine. Our twins are a PRIME example of the dizzying over the top love that our GREAT GOD pours out on us...
To our sweet miracle TWINS...I said it weeks ago and I'll say it again...the best is yet to come my loves!!
